|Sunday, January 2nd, 2005|
danis pissing me off again, but what can you do, apart from knocking off to another country or even planet. and the last two days have been high and low
- My story deleted itself
- danis pissing me off
- one of my friends is avoiding me
- i bought a new fishing rod but then some fucker stepped on it.
- 45 mins waiting for service at the music shop before i screamed at everyone and walked out
Current Mood: hyper
- The good news from Jamie (happydance)
- i can now do hand stands (for a few seconds but hey, thats great for me)
- im having a pool party soon
- im having a day out with my mates
- i get to go fishing with my step mum :) (as soon as my rod is fixed)
- i dont have to buy the cd's i was waiting for, my step mums giving them to me (GO GEORGE MICHESLS)
|Wednesday, December 29th, 2004|
what an x-mas....what a month.(lets take a walk down the short memony lane)
first the dinner dance. i kissed a girl that is my best friend. we're cool with it but apparently, some pple aint. luckily, i have a lot of great friend thats kelw with it (plus bradly whos all "see thouse too, they're gay. STAY WITH THE GIRLS TAMMY")
and x-mas. i set the couch on fire. wasn't my fault...much...ok it was, but it was an accident. luckily its not that badly burnt so we can live with it till i get a new one.
and i finally got a reply from two pple i admire for the writting. i sent them an email asking them to look at my movie site, they reply "DONT USE VIRTUEL MODLE OR YOU MIGHT GET SUED" no good, bad or nothing. i was sooooo hurt.
oh well, talk later JJ Current Mood: bouncy
|Tuesday, December 21st, 2004|
havnt been sleeping well. how can i help a friend when i feel so helpless? i wish i had a sign of hope for god or something. that'll be good now. Current Mood: depressed
|Sunday, December 19th, 2004|
Im really worry about jamie JJ. i wanna help him so much yet i dont know what to do. all i can do at the moment if let him self his heart and confort him and try so help him thou his problem by word. i wanna be there for him but i diont know how.
GOD HELP ME PLEASE! what else can i do for him, i love him with all my heart and wanna be ther for him but i cant. what do i do god? Current Mood: worried
|Wednesday, December 1st, 2004|
well my exams are finished and i really need a drink.im at school in media and im craving a southen comfont and coke. butim happy beacause i believe i passed my exams with A's or B's. but im pissed off,April isn't talking to me because of what sue said, and David and Jay are moving. theres only about 30 year tens at school today. god im bored.oh well, im off to cheack upon my reviews JJ. talk later. Current Mood: blank
|Saturday, November 27th, 2004|
well thank fuk for the weekend. my exams are on monday and i dont wanna go. i know i'll pass easily but i just wanna stay home, im in one of my moods for the last week and you can probly tell from my last post JJ. oh well. talk later
|Tuesday, November 23rd, 2004|
|ranting, please just ignore
I AM IN A BAD FUCKING MOOD today JJ.!!
EVERYONE IS EITHER TRY TO MAKE ME GO ON A MURDEROUS RAMPAGE OR SEE HOW FAR IT'S GONNA TAKE ME TO SLIT MY FUCKING THROAT!!!!
NO ONLY HAS MY ARM BEEN SLASHED IN A FUCKING FIGHT BY ONE OF MY SO CALLED FRIENDS HAS BEEN GOING BEHIND MY BACK AND TELLING PEOPLE I'M BI. (which i don't care about them know but i wanted to tell them in my own time)
SOMETIMES I WONDER WHAT I'VE DONE TO HAVE EVERYONE ON MY BLOODY CASE
sometimes i wonder if anyone seems to notice how i feel latly. a few people have shown some concern (stacy, larica, janie, fiona) but no one notices little things about how i'm feeling. lately i've been feeling like i dont really belong in my group yet the group i wanna hang with dont take much notice.
plus its hard to have a crush on someone that you know is straight and have no chance in hell to date them. It's been a while since i felt that way about a perrson. i told toni i loved her but she wants to be friends. and levi still harassing me about me rejecting him. im at school right now but i dont feel like going home. i don't know what to do anymore. i wanna more out yet i dont, i wanna leave school but i dont and im in love yet i cant be. my head hurts from everything yet i cant trust myself to take some panadol to relieve it in case i take to many. it just hurts so much. everyone says im so moody now a days. cant they see im hurting.
she looks over every now and then, im trying not to cry so that she wont see. i hate people seeing me crying. everyone see the happy hyper Tamara, not the sad one. Bec (my 'friend') keeps looking over trying to read you JJ. i'm just using this session to spill everything out. it helped a bit. kind of like talking to a pych but your not ganna tell me how im feeling or what i should do. But what should i do JJ? i wanna tell her but she barly knows me, apart from talking to me occasionally in drama when we had it and in filming. maybe i should just tell someone but i dont wanna talk to anyone after my few friends seem to spill secrets. what can i do to let her know me better? i don't think her friends want me to hang around and what do i say? "Hi Janie, wanna come over? i only live an hour away?" or maybe "Hey Janie, i think i like you? wanna hang out?"
fuck this. im signing off. maybe i'll talk to her later.
|Sunday, November 21st, 2004|
|Sunday, November 14th, 2004|
i'v decided to acturly update this f***er. iom bad at updates, just look at my site. anywho, my writting has gone downhill lately. i might add a story or two later. anywho i'm off to see if i can work this thing out. Current Mood: chipper